Love Languages 2.1
How do you know what your Love language is? It is not far fetched.
What binds humans together makes us form meaningful relationships and coexist to birth something new, needed in the future, is LOVE. And Love is a beautiful thing.
Imagine a world without Love; you obviously would not have been born. A sorry case if you were not born into this world, do you think we would miss you? Certainly not. Like you would not even exist in the first place.
Unfortunately, good things intended for exemplary purposes are constantly hijacked. After they are seized, they are then turned into a weapon.
A Sorry Case:
The airplane developed by “The Wright Brothers” was a great invention in the early 1900s. The sole intention was to utilize the airwaves for faster transportation of humans, goods, and information. What do we watch in movies?
This great invention has been relegated to the use of firearms and bombs and cause massive deaths of the same humans that it was initially invented to make life easy.
The same is true for love.
Love takes on various kinds. From Eros to Philio, there are different types to Storge, to Mania, then to Agape. All the others have their existence and draw their meaning; we have turned it into a mass destruction weapon.
A medic can not cure this destruction. Government policies, interventions, or palliative can not relieve the victims of love abuse.
It can not be cured by putting a seal on the injury because the injury it causes is not as much visible, but it is an internal wound.
But Love Is A Beautiful Thing.
You can not say you love someone and do not want the best for that individual. You can not tell you love someone, and you enjoy seeing that someone sad most of the time. You also can not say you love someone and do not want to sacrifice for that someone. Love was taught in its purity to mean sacrifice. The generations before, we often enjoyed stable marriages, long life, and bliss. It all boils down to one key factor — Sacrifice.
We boys left our rooms untidy, escaped to the “Love of our life” only to get to her house, saw her cleaning her room and joined, joined happily. We stayed all night, late into the night, to talk with the “Love of our life,” and the hunger we felt was on hold because talking to this our lover was more critical than need. A girl that did not like makeup, but because of love, she painstakingly went to learn makeup just to please her lover. She knew the art of combining different food ingredients just because of her lover.
I am wondering where all that virtue went?
It is now turned into a game. Renamed “A game of Love.”
The good thing is, the true essence of love can be revived.
Let us assume you want love right now; the question to ask would be, “How can I Find True Love?”
The only sure way that has been tested and trusted is to give it. That is the sacrificial element love is composed of. Love is sacrifice, and sacrifices are offered, not hoped for, not expected to receive, but offered.
As you know from Gary Chapman’sChapman’s Five (5) Love languages, in no particular order they include:
- Quality Time
- Acts of service
- Physical touch
- Receiving gifts
- Words of affirmation
When any of these is offered, they feel truly loved, or their “love tank” is complete. Whichever one is offered should be based on what was lacking as a child while growing up.
If you spent part of your childhood alone and did not socialize enough, you were always indoors. As a result, you became an introvert, your love language will be Quality time.
You are an independent individual. Right from your childhood days, you always did things all by yourself. Never really depended on external help and seldom asked for help from even your siblings; Yes, “your love language is Acts of service.”
You were not a mushy kind of person. Hardly came in close contact, barely touched, hugged, or cuddled by those in your immediate circle, or showed physical affection. Some of us were touched were we did not like, then your love language is “Physical Touch.”
If you loved toys but lacked them. You craved cartoon characters but hardly ever got the chance to own one. Even if you got some gifts, it was not thoughtful enough, then your love language is “Receiving Gifts.”
You were often criticized, critiqued, or looked down on for your failings and did not often hear verbal praise for your accomplishments. It made you wanted to do more, wanting to be a perfectionist, but each time you tried, you fell short of the very things you craved, affirmations.
Your love language is “Words of affirmation.”
Let us bear in mind that the importance of identifying what your love language is, the better you get at giving it.
In a relationship, you owe nobody anything but to love (Philio) them. Putting yourself at a disadvantage is to disparage an individual.
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